Judah had an o.k day today. So far he is still off of the prostaglandins, yay! His temperature has been normal and he hasn't had any episodes of apnea since he stopped the prostaglandins. Sadly, his oxygen saturation levels (Sats) haven't been strong enough for us to have him out of his isolette since I took him out to nurse last night. Every time he becomes active his oxygen levels drop below acceptable levels, and of course nursing is very active. He is being given more oxygen in his bed through his nasal cannula and another tube is blowing oxygenated air into his bed so even taking him out of it will likely cause a drop in his Sats. Currently he is being sedated every 4 hours or so to keep him from getting upset because crying seems to cause the most trouble for him.
We keep reminding each other that it is more important that he's able stay off of the prostaglandins than it is for us to hold and nurse him. The reminding only does so much. This morning was really tough for me because I had such high hopes that we'd be able to nurse again soon. For the first time since he was born I really had to cry...it was so hard to just stand and watch him knowing that I couldn't hold him again for a while. Matthew and I have been praying that God would rest his hands on Judah because we cannot offer him ours. Please join us in that prayer. Even though we can't hold him, it is great to watch him sleep peacefully, and we are thankful that he is still without the prostaglandins.
It has been fun to be in the NICU during Christmas. Many of the nurses are wearing cute holiday scrubs, including auntie Amy who was wearing some that had really cute penguins in santa hats. In the last 24 hours we've received a beautiful Christmas book (donated by a family in memory of their child) and two ornaments handmade by nurses. One of the ornaments is a glass ball that has the saying "The first steps a child takes are into your heart" written on it. That nurse got footprints of all of the babies, cut them out, and put each of the prints in one of the balls. I don't know if that nurse understands how much that little handmade ornament means to us...I had just finished my big cry over not being able to hold Judah when she gave it to us. Of course, it made me cry more, but in a good way this time :)
We are overwhelmed by all of the comments and emails we've been receiving. We are greatly encouraged by them even though we don't respond individually.
We are so blessed...